Makin’ Moves

*HUUUUGE SIIIGHHH*

Finally sitting down. My mom and I have been steadily making progress for about 5 hours.
Ok that’s not true. My mom did awesome. I pouted for a while, had a temper tantrum, played with my phone, and wandered semi-aimlessly around my living room and picked apart my coat closet, replacing and tossing random stuff I haven’t been able to categorize for the past two moves.

Here I go. Moving again. Back home. With my mom. And my two little monkees. This should be interesting.

The good news is, I have a part time job, my mom is an absolute saint, and I finally feel like I’m getting out of this bad relationship-depression-anxiety-stagnation rut I’ve been in.
The bad news is, I’m still totally freaking out. My acceptance level is very low, I’m bitter and resentful and acting like a brat. I need to get over myself. It’s not about me anymore. I have two little angels who need me to be strong and loving and help make this a smooth transition. It’s hard enough on them that they don’t see their dad every day. It’s hardest on my older daughter. It breaks my heart. It makes me second guess myself.

In my heart I know this is right. I know we will be better for it. Everything will work out. I just need to keep reminding myself and being reminded by all of you wonderful people.

I’m taking my tired old butt to bed. Moving sucks.

*THUD!* (head hitting pillow)

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8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Denise
    Dec 28, 2012 @ 00:09:52

    Wow Allison,

    good work! I know it is hard and the feelings come out in many ways. I commend you for making a decision and moving forward. Your Mom is a beside you and your girls too. You are doing good by talking about it and taking your highest sense of right steps towards solutions. Keep on writing I love the way you share.

    Denise Taylor 1-800-438-0346 ext 142 Cell-704-830-4624

    Reply

  2. downeastsmurfette
    Dec 28, 2012 @ 01:02:36

    I left a long sweet comment before and now its not here. Ill have to try and do it again tomorrow.

    Reply

  3. vknust@comcast.net
    Dec 28, 2012 @ 10:56:24

    Hate that it didn’t work out w/Dave for you! Would going to a meeting help? I love my meetings for bringing sanity back in…x0
    Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

    Reply

  4. downeastsmurfette
    Dec 28, 2012 @ 11:01:00

    Ok, I’m going to try this again. What I had originally said was (kinda) that you are a strong, level headed lady who know exactly what is best for you and your girls. This is only a stepping stone to bigger and better things.Moving is always a bitch and anxiety is allowed to a point 🙂 It also does need to be about you to a point as well. The kids always will be the everything, but you need to be able to do you as well. Just remember that I am a phone call or text away 🙂 It’s all good and you will make it thru this just fine 🙂

    Reply

  5. Melmaya7/ Mel M
    Dec 28, 2012 @ 12:59:26

    all will be well, I know it, so glad you are moving along, sometimes everything sucks and then like a miracle it doesn’t, hugs from AZ

    Reply

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